Lessons Through Healing
The year I moved to Hong Kong I broke my ankle at a skatepark. The break cracked through my bones in three places requiring surgery, recovery time in the hospital, and a lot of lying down and elevating. Almost immediately I felt lost. I can remember attempting to stand and feeling as if bones were stirring within me. I was numbed through waves of deafening ringing. The voices surrounding me were muffled and dull.
From that moment onward, my thoughts lingered somewhere between self-pity and shame. And this is where I stayed for months, oscillating through an array of deprecating thoughts. I was cruel to myself. I did not process the experience as an accident, something I could overcome and move on from. I sat in discontent with myself and I suffered more because of this. A pattern that has recurred through much of my life.
THIS is why I talk about SELF-LOVE. 💗The thoughts I allowed to fuel me were misaligned with the version of myself I wanted to be. In a lifetime where we are the one person who is always there, why would we shape the thoughts we live with to be unkind? This is a notion that may come easily to some--to care deeply for themselves, be understanding of pitfalls and missteps. But for many, myself included, this act of self-love takes tools and practice. It is a constant shift in thinking. An acknowledgement that we are worthy of love and we are meant to live lovingly towards ourselves.
If you are hard on yourself, if you constantly put yourself down rather than pick yourself up, I understand. Know that you are worthy. You are whole. You are enough.
